Posts Tagged ‘pokemon

09
May
09

Ash Ketchum

Ash Ketchum has been accused of being gay so many times. Is he gay? Is he straight?

The correct answer to both of those questions is “no”.

He likes balls in some sense

He likes balls in some sense

Ash simply has no sexual interests at all.

This kid would rather run through the forest catching Pokemon than anything else because all he wants to do is become a Pokemon master. He doesn’t want to cure cancer or marry a beautiful girl, he just wants to catch one of each Pokemon and stuff them into Bill’s PC and

Stop pulling his goddamn ear

Stop pulling his goddamn ear

never see them again. That’s why they put Brock in the series.

Brock is the ladies man of Pokemon, he and Ash balance out. No one else in Pokemon gives a crap about any of the women that exist in the Pokemon universe.  He will hit on every single Office Jenny, Nurse Joy or any other girl that appears in the series. He’s the guy many girls would want to marry, too. He actually enjoys cooking delicious food, he’ll love you as long as you remain female and he’s loving and caring enough to take care of like 100 little brother’s and sisters. Of course, he isn’t allowed to have a relationship. Always, some girl on Ash’s magical journey will pinch Brock’s ear and pull him away from the girl he’s hitting on because he has a commitment to hang around with a 10 year old nerdy Pokemon trainer, that’s what all 20 year old people love to do. Sometimes he gets girls, but that’s called a filler episode.

But here, look at this:

From left to right: May, Misty, Dawn. If you didnt know that, somethings wrong with you

From left to right: May, Misty, Dawn. If you didn't know that, something's wrong with you

They start with Ash hanging out with Misty.  There’s nothing wrong with her, she doesn’t look too bad and to try and satisfy Ash, she’s the leader of a gym, that must make her a good Pokemon trainer, right? Isn’t that what Ash should be looking for in a girl, especially the Pokemon part. Still, all he wants to say is:

“LOOK, IT’S A PIDGEY WE GOTTA CATCH IT!!! LETS CATCH THE PIDGEY!!!!!!”

Misty: “Ash, I have a crush on you…”

Ash: “LOOK AT MY WEEDLE IT’S SO COOL”

Misty: “Ash, I-I really like you.”

Ash: “LOOK MY PIDGEY LEARNED HOW TO TAKE A SHIT ON THE TOILET”

Misty: “Ash, you’re weird.”

That’s why Misty left. Then came the girl who runs around in tight clothing and her annoying brother. They weren’t good enough for him either, even when May got into a bathing suit every time she saw a water bottle.

Ashs response: I CAUGHT A PINSIR

Ash's response: "I CAUGHT A PINSIR"

Finally, Dawn came around. Dawn is still there and they gave her a skirt that’s goes down about 2 inches below her waist.

Dawn probably has a crush on Ash, too, which makes me feel really bad for Brock.

On Valentines Day, Ash probably gets chocolate from all the girls. Then he feeds it to his Pokemon.

Brock, getting any chocolate at all would be eternaly grateful and punch his onyx in the face if it asked for some. His fist wouldn’t hurt, but that onyx would be wishing the red stuff flowing out of his face was onyx milk with food coloring in it.

What a Korean (except he can ask out girls).

Actually, Korean/Mexican (tan, 5,000 siblings).

-Ash, learn to love

Girls, get naked for Brock

Someone, add those to the 10 commandments

DongSaeng

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09
May
09

POKEMON HEART GOLD SCREENSHOTS+VIDEO!

click for high-res

in first 2 screenshots, chikorita is following you around. could that be like yellow?

in the last one gold is talking to lucas, the guy from DPPt. o-o what could that mean?’

SO FUCKING MYSTERIOUS

I FUCKING CAME My other post about heart gold

hahahahha more things

new corocoro scans!

07
May
09

POKEMON HEART GOLD AND SOUL SILVER

http://headlines.yahoo.co.jp/hl?a=20090507-00000019-oric-ent

FUCK SHIT DAMIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM THAT SHIIIIIIIIIIIIET IS HOT. BITCHES DROP POKEMON LIKE IT’S HOT.

FUCK AWESOME

FUCK AWESOME Those 2 are supposed to Ho-Oh and Lugia.

GSC remake is going to be bomb. For those you non-weaboos, it’s Pokemon Heart Gold and Soul Silver If this is for the DSI, I’m going to buy one right now. The official announcement will be on Pokemon Sunday, that one Pokemon TV show in Japan. CoroCoro magazine will be released on the 15th and probably will have some more screens too. Since it’s like the 10 year anniversary, I bet they’ll be released on the same day as Gold and Silver(November 21). We got Platinum 4 months after Japan, so maybe it’ll come for spring of next year, but I’ll just play it on my R4.

Nothing else has been told, except for newer graphics, sounds. Think FireRed, LeafGreen. Bulbapedia link. Official Website.

Google translate:

The popular RPG series in November 1999 as the first Game Boy was released on Monday (GB) software for Pocket Monsters Gold, Silver, Nintendo DS is a remake for the Gold, Silver, Heart of Seoul, was released in the fall as that is 7 days, according to police. 新要素を追加して、10年ぶりに“ジョウト地方”が復活する。 To add a new element, 10 years after “local JOUTO” resurrection.

ゲームボーイ版の金銀ゲーム画面 Screen version of Game Boy games gold

初代シリーズの『ポケットモンスター 赤・緑・青・ピカチュウ』に続き、初の新規シリーズとして全世界で2300万本という驚異的な売上げを記録した『金・銀』が遂に復活。 The first series of red, green and blue Pokemon Pikachu’s more, the world’s first all new 2300 series has an astonishing record sales of 10,000 gold, silver, finally revived. GB版には登場しなかったモンスターをはじめ、様々な新要素が追加される。 GB version, including the monster did not appear, and new elements are added.

ポケモンシリーズとしては、初代『赤・緑』が2004年に『ファイアレッド・リーフグリーン』としてゲームボーイアドバンス(GBA)向けに発売されて以来、今作がリメイク第2弾。 As POKEMONSHIRIZU, red, green is the first in 2004, Fire Red, Leaf Green for Game Boy Advance (GBA) has been released for the remake of his two series. またGBからGBAだった『赤・緑』とは異なり、今作はGBからGBAを飛び超えいきなりDSになることもあり、グラフィック、サウンド共に大幅なパワーアップになることは間違いなさそうだ。 GB from the GBA was also red and green, unlike GB’s now over the sudden jump from the GBA to the DS in graphics, can be both a significant power-up looks間違INA sound. 詳細は随時、公式サイトなどで公開される。 More frequently, and is published in the Official Site.”

06
May
09

Welcome to Pokemon FREAKING Tower

I hate Pokemon Tower so much.

I hate Pokemon Masters but loooovee Team Rocket

I hate Pokemon Masters but loooovee Team Rocket

It’s got ghosts, chanellers and an incredibly pissed off Marowak.

The Marowak lets Team Rocket go right by, not regarding them as intruders. But you, someone who spends more time with his Pokemon than with his mom, cannot be allowed onto the top floor of the freaking tower of Pokemon buried like 5,000 freaking years ago. No, first you need to beat your rival, kick the asses of about 15 chanelers and beat Team Rocket in their fucking casino before you’re  allowed to even challenge the Marowak without your level 100, 12′ 9″ Pokemon who gets scared out of it’s pants without a Silph Scope. That’s why I train my Pokemon to be blind.

When I catch a Pokemon, the first thing I do is stab its eyes out so it won’t get scared of the fucking ghosts. Still, it doesn’t ever work. Even when I force an Abra’s eyes open, just to stab

ITS NICE TO SEE YOU

IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU

them out, it still gets scared. To scared to even use teleport and run away. What the fuck is this shit?

That’s not the only thing about the tower. The dialog spoken by every channeler sounds like the writer decided to take two knifes, stab them into both of his eyes and then bang his fist against the keyboard until it breaks. That’s why it costs $40 for the piece of dialog that each channeler says.

(Not much else to say… I need to play Pokemon Tower more…)

I guess I like stabbing eyes.

-I’m out

(Bad post, sorry… Look at this, instead)

:D

:D This is a terrible book to write

02
May
09

100 Pick-Up Lines for the Lonely Lover’s Soul

Credits goes to the guy who invented pick-up lines, and the guy who invented love, and the guy that invented sex.

These are cheesy, nasty, and lame. Plus they are 93.5% stolen. READ AT YOUR OWN CAUTION!

  1. If you were Sprite, I’d obey your thirst.
  2. Pokémon:Like an Umbreon, I evolve at night.
  3. Pokémon:I just want to Pik-A-Chu.
  4. Pokémon:My Kadabra used Future Sight and it looks we have a future together.
  5. Pokémon:If I were a Nidoking, you would be my Nidoqueen.
  6. Pokémon:If I were a Clefairy, I’d Double-Slap that ass.
  7. Pokémon:Hello, I’m from Team Rocket, and I’m here to steal your heart!
  8. Pokémon:Wynaut go out with me?
  9. Pokémon Classic Style: If you were a Pomon, I’D CHOOSE YOU!
  10. You have 206 bones in your body, would you like another one?
  11. Are you wearing space pants? Cause your ass is out of this world.
  12. Are you Crayola? Because you color my world. (LOLREPEAT)
  13. You are sweeter than 3.14
  14. You must be a parking ticket because you have fine written over you.
  15. Do you work at Subway? Cause you just gave me a foot-long.
  16. Did you just fart? Cause you just blew me away!
  17. Stolen from the Office.
    ** Angela goes through a box, looking for something **
    Andy: Are you looking for dinner and a movie? Cause it’s not in the box.
  18. If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
  19. Do you work for UPS? Cause I saw you checking out my package.
  20. : My name isn’t Luna, but I definitely know how to Lovegood!
  21. Hagrid’s not the only giant on campus if you know what I mean.
  22. Do you have a mirror in your pants, cause I can see myself in them.
  23. There’s something wrong with my phone. Your numbers not in it.
  24. I’m good at math. U+I=69
  25. You must be a broom, because you swept me off my feet.
  26. I’m like a Rubik’s cube, the more you play with me, the harder I get.
  27. Are your words on paper? Because that’s what I call fine print.
  28. I’m glad I brought my library card because I am checking you out.
  29. Are you a terrorist? Cause you DA BOMB!
  30. Were you arrested earlier? It’s gotta be illegal to look that good.
  31. I lost my teddy bear, would you sleep with me?
  32. You’re so sweet, I could get a cavity.
  33. The only reason I would kick you out of your bed is so that I can fuck you on the floor.
  34. You have nicer legs than an isosceles right triangle.
  35. If I told your tits were big, would you hold it against me?
  36. If your left leg was Thanksgiving, and your right was Christmas could I visit in between the holidays?
  37. People call me _______ but you can call me tonight.
  38. You be the Dairy Queen and I’ll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I’ll do it your way.
  39. Classic: Do you want to have sex?
  40. Are you free tonight or will it cost me?
  41. If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same answer as the answer to this question?
  42. Are you a tamale? Because you’re hot.
  43. Nice fucking weather. Want to?
  44. YOU:Can I get directions?HER:To where? YOU:To your heart.
  45. I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I could make your bed rock.
  46. If this bar is the meat market, you must be the prime rib.
  47. Do you know karate? Because your body is kickin’.
  48. You’re so hot, the sun is jealous.
  49. I’ve got a condom with your name written on it.
  50. I’m an organ donor, need anything?
  51. The CIA wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
  52. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again.
  53. Can I have fries with that shake?
  54. YOU:Wanna come over for sex and pizza?HER:No.YOU: What? You don’t like pizza?
  55. Is your dad a baker? Cause you have some nice buns.
  56. I want to rosin your bow.
  57. I’m writing a phone book. Could I have your number?
  58. Your boyfriend tells me that you’re great in bed.
  59. You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case.
  60. Baby, let’s play Titantic. You can be the iceberg, and I’ll be the boat that goes down on you.
  61. Do you know CPR? Because you take my breath away.
  62. You+Me. Minus Clothes. Divide Legs. Multiply.
  63. Have I introduced you to my friend, Mr. Harry Dick?
  64. Did you come from the zoo? Because you bring you the animal in me.
  65. You remind me of a compass because I’d be lost without you.
  66. You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
  67. If you were a door, I’d bang you all day.
  68. Is it hot in here or is it just you?
  69. If you were my homework, I’d spread you out on the table and do you.
  70. Roses are #FF0000
    Violets are #00FFFF
    All my base
    Are belong to you.
  71. You must be very tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day.
  72. Your place or mine?
  73. Excuse me, can I have some sex, in exchange for sex?
  74. I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you.
  75. A/S/L ?
  76. You made floppy disk turn into a hard drive.
  77. Hi, I like your butt, could I wear it as a hat?
  78. What’s cookin’, good lookin’?
  79. I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t cum in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
  80. I envy your lipstick.
  81. What do you want for breakfast?
  82. They call me “coffee”. I grind so fine.
  83. Can I read your T-Shirt in braille?
  84. You make me crescendo.
  85. You’re so hot, your ass is on fire.
  86. I’m writing my  term paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering if I could interview you.
  87. You’re the marshmallows in my Lucky Charms.
  88. If I’m a pain in your ass… We can just add more lubricants.
  89. I lost my penis, could you help me find it.
  90. Is your name Gillette, because you’re the best a man could get.
  91. Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
  92. Why don’t you come over and sit on my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that pops up?
  93. I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
  94. Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
  95. So, come back to my place, and if you don’t like it I swear I’ll give you a full refund.
  96. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
  97. Can I see your tan lines?
  98. Help the homeless. Take me home with you.
  99. BEST PICK UP LINE EVER

    Can you pull it off?

So now, I have lost faith in humanity, because pick up lines do not work. I usually don’t like XKCD but.

That is how I sincerely feel.

Since pick-up lines don’t work, you might as well learn how to hide your boner.

I’m sorry if I offended anyone. Good night,Vietnam.

01
May
09

Let’s Find Pokémon 2

Hey guys,

For anyone 18+

I recently rented “Let’s Find Pokémon 2” from the library because I really thought it would suit my tastes (and because the levels Pokemon evolve at are listed on the inside cover). It’s a hardcover book with about 12 pages. It’s much like “Where’s Waldo” except cooler. You see, you’re not finding a tall, skinny man with bad fashion sense, you, my friend, are searching for Pokémon.

I was quite surprised when I opened the book because I could find  no tall grass anywhere. That’s where I usually find Pokemon, why should it be different in a book? Instead, I fought places like Silph Co, Fuchsia City Beach and half of Pewter City (a page was missing).  I was amazed. Each page had almost 151 Pokémon on it (some Pokémon only appeared once in the book, adding an extra challenge).

Still, after about 4 hours of ogling at the pictures and looking for my favorite Pokémon, the default puzzles offered were quite disappointing, here’s a sample question:

WHERE THE HELL IS PIKACHU!?!

WHERE THE HELL IS PIKACHU!?!

The hardest page was Pewter City, which I mentioned earlier, because 2 of the Pokémon you needed to find were off partying on the goddamn page some little kid must have pulled out of the book to ruin my fun.

Oh wait, scratch that. I turned to this one page, it has like 200 Pikachus and you need to find 6 specific ones. Also… (Spoiler ahead)

ALL THE PIKACHUS FORM ONE GIANT PIKACHU! HOW AWESOME IS THAT!?

All in all, I really love this book. It has enough Pokemon for about 40 people at the same time and they aren’t all hiding in the tall grass like they do in games. I would rent it from the library if I were you.

Pictures – 10/10

Challenge – 7/10

Content – 9/10

Total:  86%  B+

To buy this amazing book: http://www.amazon.com/Lets-Find-Pokemon-Kazunori-Aihara/dp/1569314144

DongSaeng Out




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